Crazy nightmare my boyfriend was a god and I killed him


New member
The dream started off as a kind of video game. I opened up a game on my laptop called Civilization Egypt but it became real and not a video game as the dream went on. The world was a mixture of Egyptian and Norse mythology.

The game started off with us as childhood friends. He was a god, I was a normal person. We grew up together. He had tanned skin, blue and black long hair with glowing gold and blue rings in, a gentle looking outfit, was beautiful, radiant. I don't know what I looked like it was like first person. He was calm yet emotional, rational. I was really frustrated, angry and toying with him like he was a game character.

Once we had matured we were boyfriends, I kept leaving him, I can't remember why. Whether it was to toy with him or something else. I don't remember him doing anything wrong. The last time he got really emotional and said that if I do this he wouldn't forgive me or something. Some kind of ultimatum.

After the last time he stalked me on the internet and tracked me down. We had this huge, cinematic fight in a colossal Egyptian like palace at the top of a desert city. I killed him by smashing him into the ground from really high up. I became a god of war/god of mushroom clouds/nuclear called Bassaros or something for taking the path I had chosen to take in the real life game thing. Kinda like reincarnation. Muscular, loads of facial hair, tall, bald, tattoos, male (we are both men).

I tried resetting the life game in my dream and picking a new character but he was permanently dead in every timeline and things kept creeping up like his mother attacking me and sobbing or chasing me. I felt so much guilt, self disgust, sadness. I couldn't get him back, he was gone forever.

My family watched me killing him in the life dream game on a laptop and were disgusted with me and disowned me. (In the dream)

I woke up thinking my boyfriend was dead, that we had broken up, that my family and everyone hated me. I was relieved it wasn't real but the feelings of sadness, guilt, fear, self hatred are taking long to fade. I was covered in sweat too.

The dream sounds ridiculous, especially for a nightmare, but it felt so real.

Does this mean anything?